Baylor MAY have blown the excellent 24-point lead they had on TCU Friday night, but they managed to pull things together for a thrilling win that reminded college football fans everywhere why they love the game. Robert Griffin III (RG3) was outstanding in the Bears’ season opener. He threw for 359 yards and gave TCU a really hard time with his mobility. The Bears racked up the most yards and points against TCU in 6 years, and gave the Horned Frogs a kick in the junk that more than made up for their deflating loss last season (TCU 40, Baylor 10).

Not: The Emperor’s New Clothes

Actually, the Emperor’s nude statement would be preferable to Maryland’s Monday night apparel. Seriously, Under Armour, that was just mean.

Hot: More Moniz More Problems

Bryant Moniz made a huge statement against the PAC 12’s newest member late Saturday night. Hawaii’s quarterback ran for a career-best 121 yards against Colorado. The team as a whole only covered 163 yards on the ground. Moniz also passed for three touchdowns, and steadily led the Warriors to a solid 34 to 17 victory in their season opener. Way to make the WAC proud, brudah.

Not: Utah Deflate, er, State

Oh, Utah State. You are such a tease. I really thought for once you had the giant upset W in the bag. But noooo, that was just too much to ask, wasn’t it? How could you let Auburn score TWICE in 2 minutes to win the game? HOW!? I mean, I tip my hat to Auburn for remaining composed enough to get the quick scores needed to win, but really this was your fault, Aggies. And underdog lovers everywhere are truly disappointed in you.

Hot: Redemption is spelled B-S-U

Considering that Boise State came into the season with a 0-4 record against SEC teams, and were completely decimated the last time they traveled to Georgia (48-13 loss), plenty of mid-major haters were dubious about the Broncos’ ability to win Saturday. Sucks to be those guys! Six different Broncos scored, and Kellen Moore threw 261 yards and 3 touchdown passes. While Mark May (ick) said “The Bulldogs may look like Tarzan, but they played like Jane against Boise State,” everyone that watched the game knows the Bulldogs played well. They just didn’t have enough to keep up with the Mountain West’s newest member.

Not: The Weather

Come on, weather! What did college football ever do to you? There’s no need to throw a tantrum like you did this weekend. In the Notre Dame/South Florida game, fans had to leave the stadium at the half due to severe weather. During the first delay, the teams were off the field for a little over 2 hours. Later, with a little more than 4 minutes to play, the game was delayed for an additional 45 minutes. In the Michigan/Western Michigan game, play was delayed twice during the third quarter, the stadium was evacuated, and eventually the game was called with a little over a minute left before the fourth quarter. And in the Marshall/WVU game, play was also stopped two times. The game was ultimately called just after the start of the fourth quarter. Personally, I think weather had a terrible attitude this weekend and needs a timeout before week two gets under way.

Hot: Coach’s Change of Heart (if he has one, anyway)

Stephen Garcia’s off-field troubles kept him out of the starting lineup in South Carolina’s opener against ECU. However, after a three-fumble performance by his backup in the first quarter, Spurrier decided to let the troublemaker back on the field. Gamecock fans are eternally grateful to Stevie McGrumpyPants for doing so. With Garcia in charge, the Gamecocks came back from a 17-0 deficit to beat ECU 56 to 37.

Not: Four Turnover Casserole

I sure hope the Ducks weren’t hoping to make up for their National Championship performance in their opener again LSU. Cause, wow. They sure didn’t. Oregon had four turnovers in the game, three of which led to 20 points for LSU. De’Anthony Thomas performed particularly well (or something like that), fumbling on two consecutive touches: a run and a return in the third quarter. On top of their troubles holding onto the ball, the Ducks racked up 12 penalties for 95 yards. And, 2010 Heisman Finalist, LaMichael James, managed only 54 yards, averaging 3 yards per carry. But it’s not all bad news, Ducks fans, their uniforms were spectacular!

Hot: A Lynch Mob in Reeser Stadium

Sacramento State, you know….the FCS team, marched into Reeser Stadium and came away with a huge win for their program (considering they’d lost 10 straight against FBS opponents). And handed the Beavers a huge loss for theirs. At the half, Beaver fans booed their team (down by 11) into the locker room. And I can only imagine that they slashed all the players’ tires after Sac State’s gutsy two-point conversion in overtime to clinch the win.

Not: Same Ole Miss

BYU was awesome at moving the ball against Ole Miss Saturday, at least until they got to the red zone. This led to Ole Miss being up by 13 going into the fourth quarter. Sadly, much like their heroes at Utah State, try as they might, Ole Miss could not hold on for the victory. BYU managed a successful series early in the fourth to pull within 6. Things looked manageable from there, but when BYU recovered a disastrous fumble on what should have been Mississippi’s time-eating final drive, the fat lady starting belting out the Cougar fight song. So, you know, thanks for nothing. See if I ever cheer for you again.

Okay, so Indiana hasn’t won a Big Ten game this season, but Wisconsin’s 83 points is still pretty darn HOT! And, as crazy as it is to think if a team scoring that many points, it’s even crazier when you look at the stats. Wisconsin had just under 600 total yards of offense, 260 passing/338 rushing yards, and possessed the ball for 32 minutes.  In this weekend’s performance, the Badgers scored the most points by any FBS school this season. And, matched the most by a Big Ten team since 1950. As one of the Badger players said after the game, it’s their job to execute and if the other team can’t stop them so be it.  

Not: Unbeaverlievable

Washington State…. Really, Beavers? You just HAD to lose to a team that hasn’t won a conference game since 2008, didn’t you? Not only that, but you let them stop you from scoring at all in the first half. You know how long it’s been since their defense has managed that? THREE seasons, that’s how long! After 5 consecutive bowl-eligible seasons, you probably just got tired of the bowl drama, right? Yeah. Who needs it? If you can’t beat them…..hmmm…..how’s the end of that phrase go? Oh, well. It’s not applicable anyway… in your case, you can’t.  

Hot: Give me five

Anyone have any guesses about how many times Northwestern has beaten Iowa in the last 6 tries? (Hint: look at the title) Yep! You guessed it, you smarty you: FIVE! While the Wildcats weren’t much to speak of in some of those seasons, this year they are good and they aren’t getting much credit for it. And, well, if you can’t get credit the next best thing is to ruin your opponent’s chance at greatness. Right? Thanks to Northwestern, Iowa is pretty well out of the hunt for the Big Ten title. Nice work, Cats.

Not: Trojan Wildcat

Dan Persa’s impression of Brad Pitt in Troy was spot on, but not really what the Northwestern faithful were hoping for. Following the pass that gave Northwestern its big win, Persa’s Achilles’ tendon ruptured when he ran to celebrate with his teammates. Maybe THAT’s why the refs throw that pesky celebration flag all the time. They have always known it would lead to destruction. Seriously, though, Persa’s season-ending injury is bad news for Northwestern.

Hot: What do we do now?

After their trip-to-the-SEC-Championship-Game victory over Florida this weekend, South Carolina’s players weren’t sure of the protocol. The coaching staff had to nudge them toward the proper celebratory practices (such as rushing the field and drenching the coach). According to Coach Spurrier, “We haven’t had many championships. We had to coach them up a little bit.” Uh, coach, “many” is a bit of an overstatement. After all, this is the Gamecock’s first league title since joining the SEC 18 years ago. But, hey, maybe going through Spurrier’s old team and getting their first win in Gainesville means this counts as multiple victories.

Not: S-s-st-sttt-stuttering Stanley, er, Giorgio

After holding Oregon to 40 points below their average and shutting them out in the first and fourth quarters, you couldn’t pull out a win, Bears? Ugggh. You better watch your backs because Bronco Nation, and most likely the Horned Frog toadies too, have put out a hit on you. Yep, everyone one of you darn California Bears. Of course, some may have an extra special treatment (tickle torture or worse!) lined up for Giorgio Tavecchio.  After scoring the would-be game-winning 24-yard field goal, it was determined that Tavecchio took a stutter step before the snap, which resulted in a five yard penalty. The 29-yard retry was no good. And that, friends, is the tale of how Cal didn’t win this weekend.

Hot: Tennessee WINS!

Nope, that isn’t a joke. Tennessee really did win! No witty title needed. The Vols have managed to get two consecutive victories for the first time this season, AND their first SEC win. The fact that the W comes at the expense of Old Miss’s Jeremiah Masoli is just a bonus. Masoli finished completed only 7 passes for 80 yards, threw three interceptions, and orchestrated no touchdowns. Oh, oh….and ran for a measly 22 rushing yards. Maybe Tennessee’s defense can play after all.

Not: Utahrrible

Remember when Utah was ranked #5 in the country? That sure was funny wasn’t it? We all knew they were overrated, but to get destroyed by Notre Dame is jut sad. Even more sad that they couldn’t have played this game the week BEFORE their TCU matchup.  Honestly, Utah didn’t play a decent team until October 30—the same week their huge wins stopped. Utah beat Air Force by 5 points, and has only managed to score 10 points since. Just how did they get ranked #5 anyway? To start the season they beat a SEVERLY overrated Pitt team in overtime by 3 points. Following that they beat all the college football “greats”……UNLV, New Mexico, San Jose State, Iowa State, Wyoming, and Colorado State. Not much to boast about really.  Yeah, Utah, you really aren’t hot. Sorry.

1. UCLA, No one thinks you stand a chance against Oregon. How about you prove them wrong? How about you double their score? I dare you.
2. Northwestern, THIS is your week to prove your 5-1 record is not a fluke. You are hereby challenged to beat Michigan State without going into overtime.
3. Penn State, Minnesota…..I challenge one of you to win this weekend. (PS….they play each other so hopefully this isn’t too far out of reach)
4. Duke, your mission is to allow Virginia Tech to hand you the biggest loss in school history.
5. Wyoming, PLEASE prove you can win a conference game. I’m begging!
6. Auburn, I hate to ask you win more, but this weekend you must destroy LSU and prove that their record is strictly a result of good luck. Seriously, Les has probably won the lottery five times already this season.
7. Washington State, how about you try to score more than 30 points?
8. Colorado State, are you really going to let Utah beat you this weekend? Make this most of your last shot at them before they skip over to the PAC. Prove to us you can beat them.
9. Tennessee, the current embarrassment of the SEC, you are challenged to give Bama a game. And, also, to not whine if you can’t.
10. Air Force, if you want any respect, you WILL beat TCU this weekend. We all know you can!

Going into Saturday’s matchup with Ohio State, Wisconsin had not knocked off a number one team since I was a newborn. And Ohio State had blown its last three AP number one rankings. Hmmm….so whose statistical history would win out? The game started with an extremely exciting kickoff return for a touchdown by David Gilreath that proved to be a sign of things to come. Going into half time, the Badgers had a 18 point lead and looked unstoppable. In the second half, the Buckeyes seemed a little less willing to just watch Wisconsin run away with the win, but they just didn’t quite have the effort needed to hold on to their number one ranking. Truly excellent work, Badgers.

Not: COLINoscopy…..er…..Kaepernick

Speaking of cursed statistics….did you know that Nevada has now lost 6 straight games at Hawaii? Their last win on the island was in 1948. Apparently Colin Kaepernick buys into superstition, or the Warriors put a Haka curse on him, because he threw two interceptions and fumbled twice. One interception came on Nevada’s final drive, which if it ended with a score would have resulted in a Wolf Pack win. And one of the fumbles occurred as Kaepernick dived into the end zone and lost control of the ball, resulting in a touchback. Sigh. Thanks for nothing, Nevada. Bronco Nation should have known better than to count on you.

Hot: Return of the Mack

Nebraska fans may have been surprised about the outcome of their game against Texas Saturday, but anyone who has taken a look at the Cornhuskers’ schedule to date really should have seen it coming. Prior to this week they have faced Western Kentucky, Idaho, Washington, South Dakota State, and Kansas State. With the exception of Kansas State, not a good opponent among them. (Don’t even try to convince me of anything different, Huskies fans.) Beyond that, Texas has won nine of the teams’ last ten meetings (since joining the Big 12). At any rate, great job on stopping the losing streak and knocking off one of the remaining undefeateds, Longhorns.

Not: But we have the 6th best offense in the country

On Friday night, a Boise news station claimed that because Idaho had the sixth-best offense in the country that they would be certain to beat LA Tech on Saturday. Clearly, no one ever told them that Idaho’s defense is not good (even though it might seem like it in comparison to last year’s D) and defense, not offense, typically wins games. Saturday, Idaho’s offense did do work, accruing 526 total yards. But guess what their defense did?! Even with FOUR Bulldog turnovers, Idaho allowed LA Tech to gain 683 total yards (a school record), which was more than enough for the win.

Hot: Coach Phillips ain’t no Joker

Despite the often discussed chance of a letdown loss after a big victory, with Steve Spurrier having won 17 straight games again Kentucky, the Gamecocks seemed certain to have an easy win against the Wildcats this week. After holding Kentucky scoreless in the first half, this looked like even more of a certainty. That is, if not for Joker Phillips’ truly remarkable inspirational skills. “We challenged our guys at halftime, that we were in a street fight,” he said. “We’re in a street fight. I’m in a street fight. I want to see who has my back.” Personally, I am dumbfounded by his words, but apparently the Wildcats’ players simply needed to channel their 10-year-old Street Fighter–playing selves to become effective on the football field. Who knew? Well, Joker, apparently. Randall Cobb caught a 24-yard touchdown pass with a little over a minute remaining then added the two-point conversion to make the score 31-28. South Carolina had one last shot at getting the win, but Stephen Garcia was intercepted as time expired.

Not: Beiber Nation

How exactly Oregon State managed to even get into a predicament that would require two overtimes against WASHINGTON is baffling. But sure enough, that is what happened Saturday. As shocking as that fact might be, it was even more shocking to watch Washington start the game out with 3 unanswered touchdowns. Thankfully the Beavers woke up and performed like a team that wanted to win for the rest of the game. Unfortunately, it wasn’t enough. And in overtime, it was evident that Washington had all the momentum and Oregon State could merely try to keep up. Understandably, Mike Riley decided to try for the win at the end of the second overtime, going for two. Unfortunately, Ryan Katz’ spot on pass was dropped in the end zone and the Huskies were free to celebrate. For the record, Beavers’ play callers, as amazing as Jacquizz Rodgers is you cannot give him the ball on every play. Especially when your line is tired and the defense is expecting it. Try to change it up next time. You just might win if you do.

Hot: HOO saw this one coming?

Certainly, Houston has been in a bad spot since Case Keenum’s injury earlier this season, but a loss to Rice still seemed unspeakable. Like many other teams this weekend, Houston started out slow, working their way back from a 20 point deficit at one point. But it looked like they were going to be able to pull out the win after taking a three point lead in the fourth quarter. But the Owls would not have it. They scored on the next drive and then ensured victory after Houston’s quarterback fumbled on fourth down. With only two wins this season, the Owls had plenty celebrate this weekend.

Not: BYU…….yeah. Still.

Okay, maybe it was a stretch to even begin to imagine that on their BEST day the Cougars could take down TCU. Alright, not maybe. It was more than a stretch. It was an ignorance-is-bliss-inspired leap of faith. After all, over the last three years, the Horned Frogs have been undefeated against BYU….winning by a combined score of 101-17. But still, someone needs to beat TCU and, dang it Cougars, I really wanted it to be you! Oh, oh….and, Beavers, you should be even more embarrassed about your loss because the ONLY teams BYU has been this season are San Diego State and Washington. Even Utah State beat BYU. Come on!

Let’s be honest, with the exception of making mistakes, BSU did just about everything they could to NOT run the score up Saturday. And they still put 59 points on the board. Imagine the final if they had put their best foot forward. 200 to 0? You think? Saturday’s game featured scoring drives by 3 different quarterbacks (Moore, Coughlin, and Southwick) and touchdowns by Coughlin, Hodge, Martin, Potter, Avery, and Efaw (twice)! Even Brotzman made a lefty hashy field goal! In all, the Broncos racked up 400 yards more total offense (608 bsu/208 nmsu) than the Aggies—91 more rush yards than NMSU’s total yards.

Not: Another reason why I have no love for you, BYU

Four games into the season, BYU fired defensive coordinator Jaime Hill. Hill has been the D coordinator since 2008, and has been with the Cougars since 2006. As such, it seems unlikely that their current crappy performance can be attributed to Hill. It seems more likely that they are struggling to find their identity with a true freshman quarterback and several young skill players. Their defense is certainly not the only problem area. The Cougars rank among college football’s worst rush defenses, scoring offenses, and passing efficiency offenses. But, you know, throwing a coach under the bus mid-season is probably going to fix everything. Wins from here on out, eh, Cougs?

Hot: Crushing the Colosseum

For the second year in a row, Sarkisian’s Huskies managed to take USC down a few pegs. This time—far from their rainy comfort zone—in the land of sunshine. USC took the lead (30 to 28) with plenty of time left in the 4th quarter. The Huskies could not make the most of the opportunity, and it looked like USC would come away with the win. But no! Washington’s D stayed strong, forcing USC to attempt a long field goal. An attempt that was not successful. With little time left on the clock, the Huskies drove down the field and completed the game-winning field goal as time expired, winning the game by one glorious point. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.

Not: Trying to kill your coach

Oh, Gators. Don’t you know that your coach is likely to end up hospitalized if you keep this up? Don’t you love Urban anymore? With the exception of last week’s game again Kentucky, the Gators really have been unimpressive. Not terrible, exactly, just not real effective. And despite the claims of their black belt fan (look it up….”florida fan + Alabama + black belt”), Florida looked just plain bad against Bama Saturday. And how is it that the Gators are still ranked ahead of undefeated teams like Michigan and Michigan State that have looked much more impressive? Guess that’s the benefit of being in the SEC.

Hot: Shout outs for your friends!

Former Boise State player, Jeff Copp, and the UC Davis Aggies got a come-from-behind victory against San Jose State Saturday. Things were looking good for the nearly winless Spartans early on (up 13 to 0 at the half). But, Davis came out strong in the third quarter, scoring two touchdowns to take a one point lead that turned out to be all they needed for their second victory of the season. Even better, this was the Aggies first win against the Spartans in six tries. And, the second ever Aggies victory over an FBS opponent. Nice work, Coach Copp!

Not: Out of your Richt mind

As embarrassing as it is to start the season with 3 losses and only a win against Louisiana-Lafayette to your credit, it just gets so much worse to lose to Colorado just when you thought you had victory in sight. After driving the ball into field goal range, the Bulldogs looked to be minutes away from putting a stop to their losing streak. That is, until Colorado’s BJ Beatty decided to plow through the rusher and cause a turnover that would crush the Bulldogs’ spirit once again. A big Colorado victory = a tough time to be a Georgia fan.

Hot: W stands for Wildcats streaking (to victory)

The Northwestern Smarty Pants (or Wildcats some say) are off to a 5-0 start to the season. And after Stanford’s loss to Oregon, they must tarry on for all the smarties in the nation. The opponents may not have been amazing, but so far this season the Smarty Pants have a close-call win over Vandy (also fairly intelligent), a blowout over Illinois State, a decent win over Rice (again….bright ones), a nice win over Central Michigan, and this weekend’s nail-biting one-point win over Minnesota. Keep it up Cats. The nerds are counting on you!

Not: Coach, your whining has been Dooley noted

Well, Tennessee finally put together a solid game on Saturday. All except for that one, glaring game-losing mistake. If you missed it, LSU had the ball on the goal line and amidst confusion from personnel changes, mishandled the snap and seemingly lost the game as time expired. But only seemingly, because upon closer inspection, Tennessee had 2 extra players volunteer on defense. Yep, two defenders ran in and lined up, oblivious to the fact that their counterparts did not leave the field. So the unlucky 13 were flagged for too many men on the field and LSU was granted another attempt at the final play. This time, the snap was clean and they easily ran the ball in for the game-winning score. In disgust, Tennessee’s head coach, Derek Dooley threw his headset down in frustration. Post game, he was quoted saying, “Things happened fast and guys didn’t run off the field. The ball was snapped pretty quickly, and so we lose the game. The rule is, when they run guys out on the field, we have to have adequate time to run guys off.” Yeah, coach. No one on your team was trying to run off the field. They all just lined up. That’s not cheating. It’s poor execution. Suck it up and deal with it.

Seriously, was it just me or was it 7 million degrees during the first quarter of Saturday night’s game? It was just me? Hmmm, okay. Bronco Stadium was still hot in many other ways this weekend, though. Anyone happen to catch College Game Day? Yeah, that’s right. It was in BOISE (boy see, no Z). Super hot. Oh, oh….and did you hear that Mark May actually gave BSU a teeny little bit of credit for once!?! (He said he would pick the Broncos over the Horned Frogs at a neutral site……I mean….hello Fiesta Bowl? Anyone?…..but still that is practically gushing for Mark May to say it.) Hot. And despite refs that had apparently never seen holding before and had a score to settle with BSU (practically GAVE Oregon State a touchdown, actually), the Broncos pulled out the win and keep the dream alive! Hot, hot, hottie, hot.

Not: Bullying the little guys

Yeah, yeah, Ohio State is amazing. I’m not going to say they aren’t. But, the fact is, we really haven’t seen them do anything all that great so far this season. Sure, they beat Miami, but they didn’t destroy them. And the rest of their opponents? Marshall, Ohio, Eastern Michigan…..give me a break. I think your AD can do a little better than that, Buckeyes. It will be interesting to see just how amazing they look when they meet up with the four remaining ranked opponents on their schedule—particularly Michigan to close out the season.

Hot: The Wolfpack, Part Un

Hold on to your seats, NC State fans! This year your team is actually good (and, no, hell has not frozen over). With the exception of a close game with Central Florida (of all teams), State has been dominating its opponents this season and has finally worked its way into the hearts of the media voters (currently ranked 23 in the AP poll…..the coaches are yet to be convinced it seems). To be fair, though, Georgia Tech is really the only “tough” opponent the Wolfpack has faced so far. And, for Boise State’s sake, I hope this winning streak comes to an end this weekend against Virginia Tech.

Not: Padron me, but are you sure you’re a QB?

Speaking 100% honestly, if SMU’s QB could throw a pass under pressure (both physical and mental), the Mustangs would have beaten TCU Friday night. For the entire second half, nearly every pass was overthrown, underthrown, wide right, or wide left. Barring the (very slim) possibility that the entire receiver core ran their routes wrong for two quarters, I am going to have to put the weight of this one on Padron’s shoulders. SMU had chance after chance to pull out the upset and every time, he poorly passed it away. In fact, he only completed 14 of 35 attempts Friday night. Well, 15, if you count the one he completed to TCU’s Tejay Johnson for a pick six. Back to work, June “the QB master” Jones.

Hot: Bruin up some Longhorn Stew

UCLA cooked up a delicious pot of Longhorn Stew for Texas fans Saturday. In case you want to make some for yourselves, the ingredients are: 5 turnovers (4 in the first half), 1 embarrassed Mack Brown, 100,000 disgusted fans, and 264 rushing yards (only 27 passing) against the nation’s top defense. Undoubtedly, the Bruins will be eating leftovers all week. Yummy!

Not: It’s just so WAC

Oh, come on WAC. You were just starting to make the conference proud and then you go and do this. No. I don’t want your excuses. Go think about what you’ve done (or didn’t do in this case). And don’t come back until you’re ready to behave. Oh, you need specifics, huh? Well, Idaho, really awesome work on that loss to Colorado State (who had lost their last 12 games). And, Fresno….Ole Miss? Really? They lost to VANDERBILT. Come on. And you let them get nearly 600 total yards and 55 points? Did you even take your defense, Pat Hill? Sigh. Hold it, Utah State. You’re aren’t getting out of here without a lecture! San Diego State!?!? You almost beat Oklahoma and then get destroyed by SDSU? I can’t even look at you right now.

Hot: Holy TOLEDO!

Toledo, I would like to formally express my sincere thanks for listening to Bronco Nation and shaping up your act. Since your less-than-thrilling 2-point season opening performance, you have won 3 straight. Most notably, taking down the Big Ten’s Purdue over the weekend. This is especially notable considering that Toledo came into the game with the nation’s worst offense (which is really quite hard to manage this season). While the Bronco Nation is proud of you, we look forward to handing you your second loss soon.

Not: You play like Athena (aka girls) 

This weekend, Georgia lost to Mississippi State for the first time in 10 meetings. The Bulldogs have lost three games in a row for the first time since 1990 and are 0-3 in the SEC for the first time since 1993. What more is there to say? Except, pack your bags, Mark Richt. Oh, and I’m looking forward to the coming pillow fight between you and Tennessee.

Hot: The Wolf Pack, Part Deux

Like NC State, Nevada broke into the rankings this week and is also off to a 4-0 start to the season. This is the Nevada Wolf Pack’s best start to a season in 19 years (some of their players’ entire lifetimes). With UNLV and SJSU on the schedule for the next two weeks, it looks like Nevada will easily extend their record to 6-0, and may remain undefeated until their Thanksgiving weekend matchup with Boise State.

Not: Maybe croquet is your game?

Oh, Razorbacks. We all thought you had the pesky Tide all wrapped up. But sadly you didn’t, did you? And darn that Nick Saban for going for it on 4th down (deep in Bama territory) to keep you from having a chance to come back and winning. Much like SMU, Arkansas was held back by quarterback issues in the 4th quarter. The normally outstanding Ryan Mallet had only 40% completions in the 4th quarter and two interceptions. Certainly this was the difference between the win and a sad, close loss for the Razorbacks.

The Wyoming fans were out in full force Saturday. Surprisingly obnoxious, too. And, after a particularly belligerent one told us, “BSU sucks. They could barely beat Virginia Tech who is 0 for 3,” it was clear there were plenty of misinformed (seeing as how VT won this weekend) haters hoping for a miracle that night. There were some signs of intelligent life once the game started, though. One fan was heartily applauded by the Bronco Faithful as he entered the stadium with a sign reading “BYU Good Riddance. BSU Good Addition.” And, after the 51 to 6 beat down, several of the fans that didn’t bail after the 3^rd quarter stopped to welcome BSU to the Mountain West, to thank us for coming out, and to wish us luck in the rest of the season. Apparently the delusional loud mouths skulked out early so they wouldn’t have to face us.  

Not: The Same OLE MISStakes

I hope Masoli is loving the classes he “had” to take at Ole Miss, because he certainly can’t be loving the season so far. Vanderbilt, on the other hand, is ecstatic to have broken a 10 game SEC losing streak (winning zero conference games in 2009). And if losing to Vandy isn’t embarrassing enough on its own, say if they had the most amazing performance in their history, Ole Miss let it happen in the worst way: dropping two touchdown passes, missing a field goal, passing 2 interceptions, and fumbling the ball away to set up Vandy’s final touchdown.

Hot: Running With a Pack of Wild Wolves

After soundly stomping their first two opponents this season it looked as though Cal was headed toward being ranked in week 3 and looking forward to a promising season in the PAC. In fact, after collectively scoring nearly 100 points more than their first two opponents, it’s a little hard to figure why they weren’t ranked in week 2. Well, until Nevada and 17^th season (I believe) senior QB Colin Kaepernick came along anyway. Nevada’s offense might not be real balanced, but it looks like they don’t need to be. With a mobile quarterback and a strong senior running back (Vai Taua), Nevada is definitely looking to make a statement this season. And for that, the WAC thanks you.

Not: B-Y-YOU are Gonna be Sorry Next Season

The whole BYU move to being independent is looking more and more disastrous every week. It would be hard enough to develop a good schedule with a decent team, but BYU is looking like they would be a bottom feeder in the SUNBELT this season! Okay, that might be a little harsh. After all, they beat Washington. …but Nebraska made it pretty clear this weekend just how great the Huskies are. And with Nevada up this weekend, things are not looking to improve in the near future for the Cougars. It breaks my heart (ha). It really does (double ha).   

Hot: Here’s to you Mr. Robinson

All you Michigan fans out there better get out your Hello Kitty notepads and pens and write Denard Robinson a letter of admiration and thank him for blessing your program with his awesomocity. So far this season he has scored 4 rushing TDs and 4 passing TDs, and has accounted for 671 yards in the air and 559 yards on the ground. Oh, and if you still have a next year, Coach Rodriguez, you better buy Denard a pony or something (PS….Wyoming has an awesome one they might sell you for cheap).

Not: UConn’t Get Much Worse

Alright, alright. So Temple is 3-0 for the first time since 1979. But even so, their win again UConn Saturday was their first over a BCS opponent since they beat SYRACUSE in 2004. And, sure, UConn did blow out Texas Southern last week, but right now it is looking like that might be the only win they get this season. Maybe they should have put BYU on the schedule this season. It might have been the pillow fight of the week!

Hot: The Biggest (Game) Balls Ever

Notre Dame and Michigan State battled and back and forth all game, eventually ending regulation tied at 28, and forcing an overtime showdown. The Fighting Irish got the ball first, going up by 3 with a field goal. The Spartans too looked like they would be forced to attempt a field goal to tie things up and take it into OT number two. But, not so fast my friend (in honor of Game Day coming to Boise!), on the ballsiest of all OT plays, Michigan State faked the kick and instead passed the ball for a TD to win the game. This was undoubtedly the most thrilling moment of this weekend’s football matchups. Nice work, Spartans!

Not: The Lesser of Two Tigers

Clemson! We were pulling for you. How dare you let us down like that? If you missed it, Clemson nearly beat Auburn for the first time in 59 years Saturday. That is, until a PENALTY was called after the successful double-overtime-forcing field goal. The illegal procedure call backed Clemson up 5 yards and resulted in a missed second attempt. I think Dalton Freeman, the center who double clutched the ball on the first attempt, had to hitchhike home after the game.

Remember the glorious afterglow following the huge-ratings-getting Virginia Tech opener? You know, when all was right in Bronco Nation and the country was paying BSU the respect it deserved. Well FBS football simply could not stand for that so it engineered a VT loss to James Madison just days later. Sure, the Virginia Tech athletic department is partially responsible for thinking that its team could recover and prepare for another game in 4 days, but I’m pretty sure college football put them up to it. That and the Hokies undoubtedly realized that boycotting potatoes was really only a punishment for their taste buds so then decided that losing this week was the best way to carry out their revenge against Boise State.

2. It will do just about anything to get on TV

So what is a team to do when they aren’t getting the media attention they believe they deserve? Your mom might say to keep your head up and try harder: the media can’t ignore you forever. But is that what FBS football does? No. FBS football would rather take the easy way out and lose to an FCS team instead. Besides the James Madison win, Minnesota decided to give one to South Dakota, Ball State rolled over for Liberty, and Washington State barely eeked out the win against Montana State. I guess if you can’t get positive attention, negative attention is better than none at all.

3. It enjoys toying with your emotions

On the 40th Anniversary of the tragic Marshall plane crash, it looked like magic was going to happen. Marshal was about to get its first victory over their rivals, the Mountaineers, in 10 tries. With a 15 point lead going into the 4th quarter and raucous home crowd on hand, everything looked to be in Marshall’s favor. That is, until FBS football woke up from its nap. Subsequently, WVU scored the needed 15 points to take the game into overtime and Marshall missed the field goal needed to take it into a second overtime. And, thus, the Thundering Herd was quieted yet again.

4. It doesn’t come through for you, no matter how supportive you are

Penn State, Miami, and Wyoming were all supposed to come out on top Saturday. Well, by supposed to, I mean no one thought they would, but I believed with all my might that they could shake up the college football world over the weekend. Sadly, not one of them even tried to prove me right. Each team happily dreamed of sock hops and clam bakes while letting Alabama, Ohio State, and Texas (respectively) run away with the win and ruining what was supposed to be a big day of huge matchups in the process.

5. It gives you false hope about where you stand 

Would anyone like to Volunteer to play defense at Tennessee? Cause (Justin Wilcox or not) they don’t seem to get it. Tennessee had a pretty good handle on Oregon during the first half—or at least until the weather delay—going into the locker room with a tied score of 13. But FBS football must have replaced the players’ souls with those of the Lobos for the second half. At least, that’s what it looked like. The offense managed no points in the second half and the defense managed only to watch the Ducks in awe as they scored often and in style.

6. It always compares you to others

“The WAC doesn’t compare to conferences like the ACC.” We’ve all heard it, right? How about we take a closer look at this statement? How many WAC teams have lost to FCS schools this season? None. How many ACC teams have? One. How many points has the WAC scored against ranked opponents in the last 2 weeks? 127. And how many has the ACC scored? 101. How many total games has the WAC lost? 7. How many has the ACC lost? 8. And how many ranked teams does the WAC have? One. And the ACC? One. Surprising as it is, the WAC is looking pretty comparable to the ACC. So how about you give them a little credit? They rarely deserve it.

7. It is obsessed with image

USC may not be eligible to be ranked in the coaches poll, but don’t worry Trojan fans, the AP is as enamored as ever. USC has beaten Hawaii, strictly because Hawaii’s defense failed to show up, and barely escaped an unranked Virginia. Yet, for some reason, the AP still feels that they should be ranked #18, ahead of teams that have faced tougher opponents or had more convincing wins, such as Michigan, Kentucky, Arizona, and even California. Yes, with the AP it’s really your reputation that matters, not so much your performance.

If I had a time machine, or even 3 wishes from a magic genie, I would get the Aggies unfortunate pass back and give them another chance at sending the entire Sooner fan base leaping from the tops of nearby buildings and bridges. Come on, be honest. Who among you really thought Utah State (who has only beaten 1 ranked team in its history) would even score against Oklahoma? A win would have been better, Aggies, but you certainly did the WAC proud by making the Sooners earn the W. In fact, Utah State had 4 turnovers and no 4th down conversions, and STILL made it a game. I’m gonna go way out on a limb this week and proclaim that I love the Aggies. Yeah, love. I said it.

Not: Winning the game 3 times, only to lose

Okay, you got me. Dwyer High (#11) versus Glenville High (#6) is not a college matchup, but it WAS on ESPN and I do know one of Dwyer High’s coaches (shout out to Reggie Stanley) so I feel it’s only right to include this game, or it’s officials rather, on the not list this week. All in all, both teams were penalized altogether too many times and often the game got messy, but as the clock ran out, the officials made it clear that they would determine who got the W, not the players. The situation is this: with little over 3 minutes to play, Dwyer was down by 4 points. They managed two crazy fourth down conversions to keep their would-be-game-winning drive alive. Next up: a long pass to the corner of the end zone, which was caught in bounds (very clearly) and called out by the officials. Okay, no replay in high school so the boys brush it off and keep playing. New situation: 1st and goal with about a minute to play. The quarterback keeps it and pushes his way into the end zone, barely. Officials call? No touchdown. Try again. Now with about 30 seconds to play, they run the same play and this time the entire pile makes it into the end zone, clearly another touchdown (yes….that is the 3rd one with no points to show). And the officials call it down on the 1 yard line as time expires. Biggest rip off I have ever seen.

Hot: Making the most of the hand you’re dealt

If you didn’t hear about the NCAA investigation of UNC, all you need to know is that they were basically forced to travel to Atlanta to face off against LSU with the high school junior varsity version of their team. Everyone, even true blue Carolina fans, was certain that LSU would dominate what would have been a close exciting game. Wait… What’s that? It WAS a close, exciting game? And LSU might as well mark this one as a loss because only barely winning to a depleted ACC opponent is just too embarrassing? Huh. I did not see that coming. Okay, so Carolina didn’t win. But when you consider the fact that they were playing without 13 important players and were down by 20 points at half time, and had a chance to win in the finals seconds of the game, that’s not half bad. In fact, it likely means that they are going to be a force to be reckoned with the rest of the season. Well, if they can get that whole special teams thing figure out anyway.

Not: 2 pts (don’t you get that for putting your uni’s on properly?)

Dear Toledo, For the rest of the season we would appreciate it if your offense showed up for the game. We would like to improve the strength of our schedule (we are in the WAC you know?) and your 2 pitiful points are not going to cut it. Please do better next week. Love, Bronco Nation

Hot: Cheaters not prospering

Remember how Jeremiah Masoli got in trouble with the law for smoking pot and stealing, and subsequently got released from the Ducks? And remember how he made up a BS story about having to transfer schools to take a class he needed so the NCAA would let him play without sitting out a year? Yeah. Well that makes Ole Miss’s loss to Jacksonville State Saturday that much more awesome. If you didn’t know, Ole Miss is in the SEC and Jacksonville State is in the Football Championship Subdivision (the artist formerly known as 1-AA). After being down by 21 points at the half, J’ville State rallied and forced Ole Miss into DOUBLE overtime, which they won on a successful two-point-conversion play.

Not: Going for it on 4th

There are lots of reasons to go for it on 4th down, but when you are ahead by 2 TDs late the game there really aren’t any. You hear me, Tommy Tuberville?? There aren’t any. Yet for some reason Texas Tech did just that twice in the second half: once late in the 3rd quarter and once early in the 4th. The first leading to a FG and the second set up a TD for SMU, which got them back in the game and nearly cost Tech the victory. In fact, SMU had a chance to tie things up and force an overtime (or win on a 2-point conversion) late in the game. Nice play calling, Tech. Really.

Hot: Napping during the second half

When Oregon 59 New Mexico 0 scrolled by on the Bottom Line, I thought for sure that was a final score. Turns out, it wasn’t. Not even close. That was the score at half time! And, no, New Mexico is NOT and FCS school. In fact, they aren’t even a WAC school. Yeah, they are the worst the MWC (and possibly college football) has to offer. Even still, without Jeremiah Masoli and without LaMichael James (serving a one game suspension), a final score of 72 to 0 is pretty impressive. Looks like a great season is still feasible in Eugene. Way to prove me wrong, Ducks.

Not: There’s no D in Beavers, but there’s 2 in Andy Dalton

It’s another critical TCU 3rd down. Anyone know the play call? Andy Dalton on the keeper, you say? No, no, no. That couldn’t possibly work again. Could it? Even the cheerleaders can see that coming by now. And, yet, somehow the Beavers’ defense could neither see it nor stop it. Every time Andy Dalton got the ball, he became invisible (apparently) and easily captured the first down—untouched most of the time. It was incredible really. The Horned Frogs converted 11 of 17 3rd downs and Dalton carried the ball on at least half of them. And the rest of the Beaver’s defense was none too shiny. The offense worked their cute little buns off to stay in the game only to have the defense let TCU walk all over them again and again. TCU had more than double Oregon State’s first downs, had nearly double their total yardage, and had possession for 2/3 of the total game time.

Hot: Boise State proving it in DC

In case you missed it (and be sure to kick yourself if you did), BSU DID beat Virginia Tech in the season opener. In a little nod to their first Fiesta Bowl appearance, they came out big early and then did their best to make everyone watching believe that they didn’t have what it took to close the deal. And, just when all the weak sauce fans had given up hope, the D stepped it up and got the stop so Kellen Moore could march the offense down the field for a game winning TD. Stressful to say the least, but a win is a win is a win. Nice work Broncos. Way to keep the dream alive!

Not: Making it hard on yourself

Okay. So exciting as the big win was, it was not pretty by any means. BSU did just about everything they could to keep VT in the game, which is good for ratings and all, but a clean game would have been better. All said and done, BSU had 2 costly fumbles that resulted in points for VT and 11 penalties for a total of 105 yards, most of which came at the worst possible time. Most of these penalties were completely uncalled for and put the game on the line for the Broncos right to the end. I appreciated the cardio workout I got during the game, but let’s clean it up next week, alright team?

Just when it looked like Titus Young was going to fumble the opening kickoff and give Nevada an easy first score, he picked up the ball and ran it all the way back for a thrilling Bronco touchdown and statement about just who is the best team in the WAC. As usual, the Broncos stomped the Wolfpack (ten times straight now) and clinched the WAC title. Ho hum….just another day in Bronco Nation. Business as usual. Beyond the weather and the terrible officiating (see below) the only down point in this game was all the injuries. Thankfully they were mostly minor and everybody should have time to heal before a bowl appearance (and can rest up next week against NMSU). I think I might ask Coach Pete if I can fill in for anyone…shouldn’t really make much of a difference.

Not: Six blind zebras, six blind zebras, see how they run (for their lives after the game)

Um. Was it just me, or did the refs in the BSU/Nevada matchup really blow? I sure hope they got fined or egged or SOMEthing. If you missed it, here is a recap of some of the excellent calls they made in the freezing cold, rainy WAC championship-deciding game. Super Call #1: Defensive holding on an ineligible receiver. Yeah…whatever that is. I didn’t even know there were defensive receivers. Did you? Super Call #2: Pass Interference on a defender two yards ahead of the intended receiver, who fell down. Super Call #3: Giving the ball to Nevada after a questionable fumble during which Nevada picked up the ball after the play was blown dead. Fumble or no fumble, I’m pretty sure when a play is blown dead, everything that happens after that does not count. It’s like having something stricken from the record in court. Super NON Call #4: Not flagging the Wolfpack when the ENTIRE team came out on the field during an official review, instigating a chant from the stands of “Get off our field. Get off our field.” And in all seriousness, Nevada should throw a party for whichever booster slid those refs some cash money under the table before the game! Without the excellent officiating, Nevada wouldn’t have been in the game at all.

Hot: WAC losers win!

Both games may have been decided by three little points, but this weekend, Utah State took down Idaho to get their fourth win of the season, and San Jose State took down New Mexico State to get their second. Utah State may not have a lot of W’s on the board this season, but they are stepping up their game, and I like to see them come out on top sometimes! In fact, I would be thrilled to see the Aggies go to a bowl game next year! And San Jose State is just so sad this year. Their coach is out and their only other win came against Cal Poly. It’s nice that they had a little something to celebrate about this Thanksgiving weekend.

Not: Passing Time

Just for a second, put on your coaching hat and tell me what you would call in this situation: you are deep in your own territory, so deep you are snapping in your end zone, with 2.5 minutes left in the game and you are up by three points. What’s the call? I am willing to bet it wasn’t to try three passing plays in a row. More likely you dialed up some run plays to take time off the clock and keep control off the ball. Yet, for some reason Coach Mangino’s staff thought that was the right thing to do in the end of their matchup against Mizzou Saturday. So, after running about 10 seconds off the clock on downs 1 and 2, the Mizzou defense sacked the qb in the end zone to get a safety and the ball with, yes, more than two minutes and a timeout to play with. Needless to say, they got a field goal and the win, and solidified Coach Mangino’s need to send out resumes.

Hot: Running all over your rivals

Georgia may be having a questionable season, but they still had more than enough in the playbook to trample the Yellow Jackets on the road Saturday. The Bulldogs might not have been able to crush Tech’s chances at a conference title, but they definitely did some damage to their place in the rankings. Plus, it’s just good fun to beat a rival on their turf, no matter the circumstances!

Not: Farewell Florida’s Football God

Lame as it may be, I actually got misty eyed watching Tebow’s last snaps in the swamp. The stadium was a glittering sea of flashes from cameras capturing these final moments of a great leader at home. Can you imagine a Gator team without him at the helm? Has there been another player in recent history who has had such an impact, such a dominant presence, such a following among all college football fans? It is a little bit sad to see it all end. Two more games and Tebow’s college football career will be complete.

Hot: Paybacks

Okay, we all know Rice is just plain awful, but even they must have been ashamed of their showing against Houston this week. The Cougars scored 59 points in the first half, for heaven’s sake! So much for the Owl’s hopes for a repeat of last year’s dream crushing performance against Houston. I’m pretty sure Most of the Cougar’s grandpas were out there playing the second half of the game, and they still couldn’t help but put more points up. The most scored by any team this season; 73 in all.

Not: One really is the loneliest number

There may be six undefeated teams left as we close out November, but there is not even ONE one-loss team out there. There are a few one-win teams left. And a few one-conference-loss teams. But no overall records with one loss. Not sure if this is a reflection of parity in college football, or just the overall suckiosity of the majority of teams this season.