My name is Derek BooHooley….

Hot: 59 points in a glorified practice

Let’s be honest, with the exception of making mistakes, BSU did just about everything they could to NOT run the score up Saturday. And they still put 59 points on the board. Imagine the final if they had put their best foot forward. 200 to 0? You think? Saturday’s game featured scoring drives by 3 different quarterbacks (Moore, Coughlin, and Southwick) and touchdowns by Coughlin, Hodge, Martin, Potter, Avery, and Efaw (twice)! Even Brotzman made a lefty hashy field goal! In all, the Broncos racked up 400 yards more total offense (608 bsu/208 nmsu) than the Aggies—91 more rush yards than NMSU’s total yards.

Not: Another reason why I have no love for you, BYU

Four games into the season, BYU fired defensive coordinator Jaime Hill. Hill has been the D coordinator since 2008, and has been with the Cougars since 2006. As such, it seems unlikely that their current crappy performance can be attributed to Hill. It seems more likely that they are struggling to find their identity with a true freshman quarterback and several young skill players. Their defense is certainly not the only problem area. The Cougars rank among college football’s worst rush defenses, scoring offenses, and passing efficiency offenses. But, you know, throwing a coach under the bus mid-season is probably going to fix everything. Wins from here on out, eh, Cougs?

Hot: Crushing the Colosseum

For the second year in a row, Sarkisian’s Huskies managed to take USC down a few pegs. This time—far from their rainy comfort zone—in the land of sunshine. USC took the lead (30 to 28) with plenty of time left in the 4th quarter. The Huskies could not make the most of the opportunity, and it looked like USC would come away with the win. But no! Washington’s D stayed strong, forcing USC to attempt a long field goal. An attempt that was not successful. With little time left on the clock, the Huskies drove down the field and completed the game-winning field goal as time expired, winning the game by one glorious point. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.

Not: Trying to kill your coach

Oh, Gators. Don’t you know that your coach is likely to end up hospitalized if you keep this up? Don’t you love Urban anymore? With the exception of last week’s game again Kentucky, the Gators really have been unimpressive. Not terrible, exactly, just not real effective. And despite the claims of their black belt fan (look it up….”florida fan + Alabama + black belt”), Florida looked just plain bad against Bama Saturday. And how is it that the Gators are still ranked ahead of undefeated teams like Michigan and Michigan State that have looked much more impressive? Guess that’s the benefit of being in the SEC.

Hot: Shout outs for your friends!

Former Boise State player, Jeff Copp, and the UC Davis Aggies got a come-from-behind victory against San Jose State Saturday. Things were looking good for the nearly winless Spartans early on (up 13 to 0 at the half). But, Davis came out strong in the third quarter, scoring two touchdowns to take a one point lead that turned out to be all they needed for their second victory of the season. Even better, this was the Aggies first win against the Spartans in six tries. And, the second ever Aggies victory over an FBS opponent. Nice work, Coach Copp!

Not: Out of your Richt mind

As embarrassing as it is to start the season with 3 losses and only a win against Louisiana-Lafayette to your credit, it just gets so much worse to lose to Colorado just when you thought you had victory in sight. After driving the ball into field goal range, the Bulldogs looked to be minutes away from putting a stop to their losing streak. That is, until Colorado’s BJ Beatty decided to plow through the rusher and cause a turnover that would crush the Bulldogs’ spirit once again. A big Colorado victory = a tough time to be a Georgia fan.

Hot: W stands for Wildcats streaking (to victory)

The Northwestern Smarty Pants (or Wildcats some say) are off to a 5-0 start to the season. And after Stanford’s loss to Oregon, they must tarry on for all the smarties in the nation. The opponents may not have been amazing, but so far this season the Smarty Pants have a close-call win over Vandy (also fairly intelligent), a blowout over Illinois State, a decent win over Rice (again….bright ones), a nice win over Central Michigan, and this weekend’s nail-biting one-point win over Minnesota. Keep it up Cats. The nerds are counting on you!

Not: Coach, your whining has been Dooley noted

Well, Tennessee finally put together a solid game on Saturday. All except for that one, glaring game-losing mistake. If you missed it, LSU had the ball on the goal line and amidst confusion from personnel changes, mishandled the snap and seemingly lost the game as time expired. But only seemingly, because upon closer inspection, Tennessee had 2 extra players volunteer on defense. Yep, two defenders ran in and lined up, oblivious to the fact that their counterparts did not leave the field. So the unlucky 13 were flagged for too many men on the field and LSU was granted another attempt at the final play. This time, the snap was clean and they easily ran the ball in for the game-winning score. In disgust, Tennessee’s head coach, Derek Dooley threw his headset down in frustration. Post game, he was quoted saying, “Things happened fast and guys didn’t run off the field. The ball was snapped pretty quickly, and so we lose the game. The rule is, when they run guys out on the field, we have to have adequate time to run guys off.” Yeah, coach. No one on your team was trying to run off the field. They all just lined up. That’s not cheating. It’s poor execution. Suck it up and deal with it.